I have been so motivated today. I made a little "helpful tips" booklet, and Im making a "go to" binder. In this binder I have all the tools I have learned from treatment such as...
1. my booklet I made
2. food logs
3. mood logs
4. risky situation planner
5. goal setting worksheet
6. distorted thinking worksheet
I got a lot of these templates from this site.
http://www.oaktrees.org/blog/eating-disorder-worksheets
Make a 'go to' binder and use it! :)
there is hope <3
Monday, November 28, 2011
Friday, November 25, 2011
How was your thanksgiving?
What are you thankful for?
For me, the list could go on. I'm thankful for my family and friends. That I have food and shelter. I'm healthy and life is good!
For me, the list could go on. I'm thankful for my family and friends. That I have food and shelter. I'm healthy and life is good!
Thursday, November 17, 2011
Love me for me
He cries in the corner where nobody sees
He’s the kid with the story no one would believe
He prays every night, “Dear God won’t you please
Could you send someone here who will love me?”
Who will love me for me
Not for what I have done or what I will become
Who will love me for me
‘Cause nobody has shown me what love
What love really means
Her office is shrinking a little each day
She’s the woman whose husband has run away
She’ll go to the gym after working today
Maybe if she was thinner
Then he would’ve stayed
And she says…
Who will love me for me?
Not for what I have done or what I will become
Who will love me for me?
‘Cause nobody has shown me what love, what love really means
He’s waiting to die as he sits all alone
He’s a man in a cell who regrets what he’s done
He utters a cry from the depths of his soul
“Oh Lord, forgive me, I want to go home”
Then he heard a voice somewhere deep inside
And it said
“I know you’ve murdered and I know you’ve lied
I have watched you suffer all of your life
And now that you’ll listen, I’ll tell you that I...”
I will love you for you
Not for what you have done or what you will become
I will love you for you
I will give you the love
The love that you never knew
He’s the kid with the story no one would believe
He prays every night, “Dear God won’t you please
Could you send someone here who will love me?”
Who will love me for me
Not for what I have done or what I will become
Who will love me for me
‘Cause nobody has shown me what love
What love really means
Her office is shrinking a little each day
She’s the woman whose husband has run away
She’ll go to the gym after working today
Maybe if she was thinner
Then he would’ve stayed
And she says…
Who will love me for me?
Not for what I have done or what I will become
Who will love me for me?
‘Cause nobody has shown me what love, what love really means
He’s waiting to die as he sits all alone
He’s a man in a cell who regrets what he’s done
He utters a cry from the depths of his soul
“Oh Lord, forgive me, I want to go home”
Then he heard a voice somewhere deep inside
And it said
“I know you’ve murdered and I know you’ve lied
I have watched you suffer all of your life
And now that you’ll listen, I’ll tell you that I...”
I will love you for you
Not for what you have done or what you will become
I will love you for you
I will give you the love
The love that you never knew
What you dont know about that girl
see that girl you just passed in the hall?
she didn't just fall down the stairs
her dad beats her
see that girl with all the food in her cart?
she doesn't have a big get together to get ready for
she binges
see that girl with her arm all scraped up?
her cat didn't attack her
she cuts herself
see that girl in the weight room after school?
she doesn't just want to "get fit"
she doesn't eat.
the excuses are made up
the lies you believe
that girl needs help but doesn't want to ask because she feels weak
and that's what you don't know about that girl.
she didn't just fall down the stairs
her dad beats her
see that girl with all the food in her cart?
she doesn't have a big get together to get ready for
she binges
see that girl with her arm all scraped up?
her cat didn't attack her
she cuts herself
see that girl in the weight room after school?
she doesn't just want to "get fit"
she doesn't eat.
the excuses are made up
the lies you believe
that girl needs help but doesn't want to ask because she feels weak
and that's what you don't know about that girl.
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Friday, November 11, 2011
The girl in the mirror
The girl in the mirror
She haunts me
Hurts me
Laughs at me
Kills me.
The girl in the mirror
Shes numb
Dull
Full on pain
hungry.
The girl in the mirror
Shes hurting
but no one knows
because shes just...
the girl in the mirror.
She haunts me
Hurts me
Laughs at me
Kills me.
The girl in the mirror
Shes numb
Dull
Full on pain
hungry.
The girl in the mirror
Shes hurting
but no one knows
because shes just...
the girl in the mirror.
Beautiful
I was so unique
Now I feel skin deep
I count on the make-up to cover it all
Crying myself to sleep cause I cannot keep their attention
I thought I could be strong
But it's killing me
Does someone hear my cry?
I'm dying for new life
I want to be beautiful
Make you stand in awe
Look inside my heart,
and be amazed
I want to hear you say
Who I am is quite enough
Just want to be worthy of love
And beautiful
Sometimes I wish I was someone other than me
Fighting to make the mirror happy
Trying to find whatever is missing
Won't you help me back to glory
I want to be beautiful
Make you stand in awe
Look inside my heart,
and be amazed
I want to hear you say
Who I am is quite enough
Just want to be worthy of love
And beautiful
You make me beautiful
You make me stand in awe
You step inside my heart, and I am amazed
I love to hear You say
Who I am is quite enough
You make me worthy of love and beautiful
Beautiful-Bethany Dillon
Now I feel skin deep
I count on the make-up to cover it all
Crying myself to sleep cause I cannot keep their attention
I thought I could be strong
But it's killing me
Does someone hear my cry?
I'm dying for new life
I want to be beautiful
Make you stand in awe
Look inside my heart,
and be amazed
I want to hear you say
Who I am is quite enough
Just want to be worthy of love
And beautiful
Sometimes I wish I was someone other than me
Fighting to make the mirror happy
Trying to find whatever is missing
Won't you help me back to glory
I want to be beautiful
Make you stand in awe
Look inside my heart,
and be amazed
I want to hear you say
Who I am is quite enough
Just want to be worthy of love
And beautiful
You make me beautiful
You make me stand in awe
You step inside my heart, and I am amazed
I love to hear You say
Who I am is quite enough
You make me worthy of love and beautiful
Beautiful-Bethany Dillon
How to deal with dumb comments
There was a comment that was made the other day in phy ed. class. A immature boy was talking to my friend, who also has an eating disorder. She made the comment about herself being fat. The boy said, "oh yeah, your fat *sarcasm*." He later told me that he said that because she used to be anorexic. She was skin and bones. I got instantly sad. He didn't mean to make me sad. I was just sad because I was never skin and bones. If someone looked at me they couldn't tell I wasn't eating. I was just tall and thin. Ed decided to creep into my mind then and tell me, you can still be skin and bones, just don't eat and eventually, after the bloating stage and the hunger stage, you WILL be that skinny.
Listen readers,
If I almost died and I WASN'T skin and bones, what would happen if I WAS?
Ed. is. evil.
you are NOT your ed.
you are wonderfully and beautifully made by God. God makes NO mistakes. He has a plan for you. Trust in Him and things will fall into place.
Listen readers,
If I almost died and I WASN'T skin and bones, what would happen if I WAS?
Ed. is. evil.
you are NOT your ed.
you are wonderfully and beautifully made by God. God makes NO mistakes. He has a plan for you. Trust in Him and things will fall into place.
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
School
Getting up at 6:00 am to cath your bus
Its your first day of kindergarten!
"Excuse me, teacher. I cant figure out how to write my 'g'"
Your in 1st grade
"Now everyone get your cursive books out."
halfway through 3rd
Good job! you passed elementary school!
on to 5th
then 6, 7, 8 and you doing just great
but when the cliques start to form and the grades start to drop.
Its not so great after all.
trying to figure out who you are and where your headed isn't as easy as trying to figure out a lower case 'g'
Its more complicated than that.
Its highschool.
In high school teachers aren't as nurturing as they used to be.
Its cold, and lonely.
Its when all your friends go different ways and your just stuck in the middle.
The bell rings at 3:30 and the rush of kids flood the hallway
And your in a mix of 3,000 kids but you feel more lonely than ever.
You go through the motions.
Get up, go to school, homework, repeat.
Its not actually living-its just..school.
Its your first day of kindergarten!
"Excuse me, teacher. I cant figure out how to write my 'g'"
Your in 1st grade
"Now everyone get your cursive books out."
halfway through 3rd
Good job! you passed elementary school!
on to 5th
then 6, 7, 8 and you doing just great
but when the cliques start to form and the grades start to drop.
Its not so great after all.
trying to figure out who you are and where your headed isn't as easy as trying to figure out a lower case 'g'
Its more complicated than that.
Its highschool.
In high school teachers aren't as nurturing as they used to be.
Its cold, and lonely.
Its when all your friends go different ways and your just stuck in the middle.
The bell rings at 3:30 and the rush of kids flood the hallway
And your in a mix of 3,000 kids but you feel more lonely than ever.
You go through the motions.
Get up, go to school, homework, repeat.
Its not actually living-its just..school.
If life was easy...
If life was easy, what would we have to work for?
If like was good, and we didn't have the bad times, the good times wouldn't be good, they would be normal
Fight through the bad, embrace the good, rejoice the new and cherish the old.
If was was easy it wouldn't be..life.
If like was good, and we didn't have the bad times, the good times wouldn't be good, they would be normal
Fight through the bad, embrace the good, rejoice the new and cherish the old.
If was was easy it wouldn't be..life.
Monday, November 7, 2011
Saturday, November 5, 2011
Friday, November 4, 2011
Devotionals
Oh how I love Devotionals.
I got a new devotional today and as I go along with the 162 days, Ill keep you posted.
Today (day 1) I read on Living Before God.
Matthew 5:27-29, 33-37 says
27 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’[a] 28 But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 29 If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.
“Again, you have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘Do not break your oath, but fulfill to the Lord the vows you have made.’ 34 But I tell you, do not swear an oath at all: either by heaven, for it is God’s throne; 35 or by the earth, for it is his footstool; or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the Great King. 36 And do not swear by your head, for you cannot make even one hair white or black. 37 All you need to say is simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one.[a]
What are your thoughts? Comment or email :)
beyondbeautifulcampaign96@yahoo.com
God Bless
<3
I got a new devotional today and as I go along with the 162 days, Ill keep you posted.
Today (day 1) I read on Living Before God.
Matthew 5:27-29, 33-37 says
27 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’[a] 28 But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 29 If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.
“Again, you have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘Do not break your oath, but fulfill to the Lord the vows you have made.’ 34 But I tell you, do not swear an oath at all: either by heaven, for it is God’s throne; 35 or by the earth, for it is his footstool; or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the Great King. 36 And do not swear by your head, for you cannot make even one hair white or black. 37 All you need to say is simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one.[a]
What are your thoughts? Comment or email :)
beyondbeautifulcampaign96@yahoo.com
God Bless
<3
Dont let ED be your ID
Just one letter. Thats the difference between ED and ID..but theres a HUGE difference.
ED-->hurtful, shameful, terrible, harmful
ID-->who are are, the wonderful, joyful, amazing you.
Dont let ED become your ID because once that happens, you are not you anymore...you are ED. Who wants to be with ED?
Now let me ask a different question...
Who wants to be FREE from ED?
Think about it.
Write about it.
Share about it.
<3
ED-->hurtful, shameful, terrible, harmful
ID-->who are are, the wonderful, joyful, amazing you.
Dont let ED become your ID because once that happens, you are not you anymore...you are ED. Who wants to be with ED?
Now let me ask a different question...
Who wants to be FREE from ED?
Think about it.
Write about it.
Share about it.
<3
Hmm
So here I sit, with my pencil in my hand, not knowing what to do, don't know where I stand. I try to write, to explain myself, says the girl who hurts herself. I want this to stop but I cant find a way to help everyone I don't know what to say. I try to be happy, but someone always brings me down, maybe just maybe, someday Ill ignore them and not hear hear a sound. Ill be happy and free, enjoying life...being just me. 'Cause me being me is more than enough, say the people who love me so much. So now as this story comes to a close, I wish you all the best, and thanks for coming to the show.
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